How will culture affect your dating life? This book explores dating histories of 15 people of 8 nationalities, including straight and LGBT people. Some of them came to Japan because of their job, and some by their choice, but they have one thing in common: struggling with dating Japanese men and women. Their stories are full of mistakes, cultural conflicts, sexy times, lessons learned, and happy moments. The author, who grew up in Japan, offers cultural perspective to each story to elucidate Japanese psyche. Enter your mobile number or email address below and we'll send you a link to download the free Kindle App.
His desire to share the best of these stories inspired him to write There's Something I Want to Tell You: True Stories of Mixed Dating in Japan. He dates internationally, although he s slightly worried that he might end up spending more time writing about dating than actually doing it/5(21). His desire to share the best of these stories inspired him to write There's Something I Want to Tell You: True Stories of Mixed Dating in Japan. He dates internationally, although he s slightly worried that he might end up spending more time writing about dating than actually doing it/5(34). True stories of mixed dating in japan - Find single man in the US with footing. Looking for romance in all the wrong places? Now, try the right place. Register and search over 40 million singles: matches and more. Men looking for a woman - Women looking for a man.
Perhaps because I met my future husband in college abroad when we were both students and now he has a typical company job, so I would rather say he is a typical Japanese.
The protagonists of these stories, both Japanese and Non Japanese, usually found their partners in a club or a bar or a similar not-so-conservative place. Many of them have "alternative jobs" or are very modern and quite free to express themselves culturally, emotionally, sexually, and mentally. There were of course some stories about traditional Japanese too, just I would like to see some more examples. We should note however, there is a huge difference between Japanese who have never traveled out of their country and Japanese who have been abroad.
As expected, Japanese who have been in other countries are often more open-minded and willing to accept the cultural differences of their partners.
True stories of mixed dating in japan
I could mostly identify with the last interviewee, an American girl called Lily. In this way, they are sure where they stand and how to plan their future together.
On the opposite, in Western countries, people usually go out on some dates first, then they form a relationship and after some time they declare their love. Lily had many experiences where Japanese men confessed their "love" to her and then they waited for her response, so that they could continue their conquest.
Why this misunderstanding? As Lily explains "some Japanese guys misinterpret it when American girls are just being friendly I feel like there are many guys who, if a girl is kind to them, become extremely happy and fall in love very easily.
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Even if I couldn't identify with all interviewees, there are still so many other intriguing things to read about.
Every single story was captivating in each own way, even when the relationships ended in a bitter-sweet way. It was a great way to bond together, discuss all the cultural differences mentioned in the stories, as well as talk about our future and the possibility that our married life may be similar to the life of some of these couples! The author, who has been in many countries himself and is highly educated, friendly and open-minded, kept the original tone of each one of the interviewees.
The Shocking Truth About Dating in Japan as a Foreigner
In the end of each chapter he offers his thoughts and his Japanese perspective about the experiences of the person, in a polite and collective way. In the epilogue, he summarizes all the incidents of the protagonists and gives advices to all Non Japanese who are or wish to be in a relationship with a Japanese person.
I wish all the best to all the protagonists of these stories. I hope they will find their significant other soon or if they have already found them, they will live happily ever after together. I recommend this book to fans of Japanese culture, intercultural couples especially Japanese - Non Japanese couples and perhaps romance fans! Even if not, it's a lot of fun to hear these real couples talk about real problems.
Dating across cultures must be difficult, but dating a Japanese person, doubly so. There are so many minefields for the couples interviewed for this book, I'm surprised any worked out! Being a bit obsessed with Japanese culture, I knew the Japanese had a rule for just about everything, and it seems that dating and relationships are no different. The trouble with these couples seems to start when the non-Japanese are vague in what the relationship actually is, or acts based on their own culture and not the Japanese culture.
I found this a bit ironic. The Japanese can seem so terribly vague to an outsider, but vagueness in a relationship? Forget it! Then comes the "kokuhaku", or the confession of love. While once in a relationship, the Japanese don't seem big on saying "I love you" to their partners, but the "confession of love" is the beginning rule of a relationship for most Japanese. Or so I grd from these pages. The part of the book I loved the most is Mr.
Aoki's discussions, on a cultural level, of why each relationship had trouble or was eventually successful. I wish this part had been more in-depth so that I could understand my Japanese friends a bit better.
There are so many vague verbal and non-verbal cues at least to this American in Japanese culture, that I sometimes find myself flustered or confused when interacting with Japanese friends. One American woman in the book called her ability to understand these cues in her Japanese husband her "automatic translator. Good to know! Perhaps Mr. Aoki's next book should be an "automatic translator guide to the Japanese.
I would have also liked to have seen the experience of an older couple most in the book, I gathered, are in their 20s and 30s. But please understand, that's based on what I wanted to know, and not necessarily within purview of the book.
Dating in Japan: Pt 1
And if you are foreigner in a new relationship with a Japanese person, you really need to read this before it's too late. For months, I was looking for a book that told the anecdotes of foreigners living and dating in japan and if it was really like the rumors that I've heard. This book really hits the nail on the head.
Each story is vastly different depending on your race, gender, and sexuality. I found moments where I genuinely felt bad for some of these people, and moments where I burst out in laughter on the train. There were definitely chapters where I felt like I wanted to hear more about their experiences in Japan in general as well as dating too.
I'm not sure if this book was really long enough, because I finished it too quickly! The only criticism I have is that out of all the interviews the author wrote, there's only one chapter told from a Japanese person's perspective.
I would have loved to see another 2 or 3 chapters from a Japanese person who has dated, or is currently dating a foreigner and what they thought. However, I realize that this might be as hard as looking for a needle in a haystack with an overwhelming majority of Japanese people who have never dated a foreigner, or had the opportunity. I am definitely recommending this book to friends interested in living in Japan.
This is an awesome book! It's really interesting to hear about all these people's stories. I'm glued to this book and It's one of the best books I have read in a while.
I recommend it to anyone, it will definitely keep you entertained! It is funny, real and unique. There is no other book like this one. See all reviews from the United States.
Top international reviews. Translate all reviews to English. These stories highlight the different challenges that can arise in interracial relationships such as different emotional communication styles shaped by their cultural backgrounds and touches briefly on other factors such as language barriers, intimacy expressions and even sexual preferences and experiences.
After every case study, Yuta gives his own opinion on some of the points discussed previously and these are the most interesting parts as he shares his Japanese perspective on some cts of the Japanese dating culture without alluding to which way is right or wrong.
Thank you for your feedback. Sorry, we failed to record your vote. Please try again. I LOVE, love, love this book. I stumbled upon Yuta's youtube channels and found him to be insightful and really funny. I brought the book from watching just one of his videos.
Once I received the book it was read within 2 and a half days. I just couldn't stop myself from reading, it is addictive.
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I found his interview style and summery of each participant, as well as explanations and cultural deconstructions to be fun! The stories are far beyond interesting. I have lent this book to my friend as she was interested in what I was reading.
So far she's loving it too. This is a big jump from my usual shonen manga reads. One person found this helpful.
My name is True Stories Of Mixed Dating In Japan Jay Connor. I started Get Laid Tonight several years ago as a resource to help guys be more successful with dating. I've been in the dating and mating game for over 30 years now. Over time, I gained a reputation for being the "go-to" guy when it came to tips and techniques for attracting women/ There's Something I Want to Tell You: True Stories of Mixed Dating in Japan profiles 15 different people (spanning eight nationalities, both straight and LGBT) dating across racial and cultural borders in the country. Yuta's deeply personal interviews touch some of the most private and intimate details of their love lives. True Stories Of Mixed Dating In Japan, interracial dating in minneapolis mn, free who is online australian dating site, magallanes vs caribes online dating. 3 hours. Her name is Ava Addams, Megan Rain form Squeaky Clean and By Hidden User (4 /
It is cool but someone reading this must pay attention that these people are not regular most common Japanese people.
Most of them are alternative and so are their relationships. Nevertheless, very interesting and I liked the style of the interviews and authors comments at the end of every section.
Translate review to English. Load more international reviews. I learned about this book watching the really interesting YouTube channel, and the book is also interesting, as well as very funny. I am creating an online ESL class "Learn Sexy English" about understanding how the English language is used in sexy and romantic circumstances. Most of my students are Japanese and I was doing a bit of research on journalists and bloggers who are Japanese and write in English about sex and dating.
I was pleased to find Yuta's book, blog and Youtube channel. I think his book starts with a fun, intriguing idea and I am impressed that he took it to such lengths by collecting so many detailed, personal stories.
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Community Reviews. Showing Average rating 3. Rating details. More filters. Sort order. Jun 18, Grace Mineta rated it it was amazing. This book is a collection of interviews with the author commentary at the end of each section. Personally, I really enjoy these kinds of books - but if that's not your cup of tea, you probably won't enjoy this book as much as I did.
The author interviews people from all different backgrounds about their experiences dating in Japan. Some of the people are likable; others really aren't. In any case, the stories are believable. And as someone who lives in Japan and is married to someone who is This book is a collection of interviews with the author commentary at the end of each section.
And as someone who lives in Japan and is married to someone who is JapaneseI could relate with a couple of these stories. Mar 06, Randee rated it it was ok Shelves: non-fictionkindleasian-books.
This easily could have been star book for me with a good editor. I think it is an interesting subject and I think the author tried hard by interviewing a variety of people.
The problem is the stories needed some tight editing. The narration rambles on and on in a perverse sort of way that I am sure the author did not intend, making most of the people giving their stories sound like they were scatterbrained or had commitment phobia.
In many cases, I felt like skipping over it and moving on to This easily could have been star book for me with a good editor. In many cases, I felt like skipping over it and moving on to the next person, but they all kind of blended into one another.
It's a pity because I think the material could have been formatted into an interesting contrast of dating opportunities, styles, experiences, etc.
Mar 26, Claudia rated it really liked it.
I have been married to a Japanese man for the last 4 years and wanted to read this book to kind of get a view on experiences that might be wildly different from my own. The stories told are super interesting, I especially liked the ones you don't hear much about: Dating in Japan when you're homosexual or bi or in general, the Japanese perspective. I know lots of foreigners married to Japanese nationals, but had never gotten an honest opinion from the Japanese part in these relationships.
The only I have been married to a Japanese man for the last 4 years and wanted to read this book to kind of get a view on experiences that might be wildly different from my own. The only thing I disliked was the somewhat clinical discussion part. It really felt like field-studies with a conclusion or whatever, and I didn't feel that was appropriate given the topic. May 26, Some Reader rated it really liked it. If you're not very interested in the Japanese society, the book is probably not going to mean a lot to you.
I got the book because I wanted to learn something about the Japanese culture, since I'm planning to visit Japan.
I got exactly what I needed from reading the book. I was able to visualize what is it like to be in a relationship not necessarily a romantic one with a Japanese person.
The book focuses on the dating ct of the dating culture in Japan, but a reader can also learn things If you're not very interested in the Japanese society, the book is probably not going to mean a lot to you. The book focuses on the dating ct of the dating culture in Japan, but a reader can also learn things about the Japanese society in general, such how Japanese men and women think, behave, or interact with one another. It also provides a picture of how Japanese people view foreigners, and how do foreigners view Japanese people.
Of course, the book doesn't provide a big picture for Japan since the country is too big and diverse, but it paints only part of the picture.
The stories told are super interesting, I especially liked the ones you don't hear much about: Dating in Japan when you're homosexual or bi or in general, the Japanese perspective. I know lots of foreigners married to Japanese nationals, but had never gotten an honest opinion from the Japanese part in these relationships/5. LOL. It's true that it's a shame that I was not interested in Japan when I was young and single, that would have be very fun I suspect.:) As you said, everyone has their own experience, and from a language perspective, I find it interesting that, while it is my case (we speak French at home, as we ended up moving here well before I knew anything about the Japanese . Dating true stories of mixed dating in japan Place can be a bit sooner, shot to a more willingly open country, because Kids kixed tend to more reserved and insignificant with warnings. If it thinks harder to date in Addition, maybe it really is.
I would recommend this book for someone who plans to visit Japan and live there for a very long period three months or more. Jun 28, Patrick Lum rated it liked it. Interestingly enough I was actually reminded more of an oral history in the vein of Studs Turkel et al as I read this. Yuta asks questions but largely doesn't intrude during each individual's recollection, letting them select what to emphasise and what to redirect from. Rather at the end of each tale he presents almost a kind of summing-up of a few cultural notes or other points that he drew from the memoirs, kind of implicitly inviting the reader to re-examine the stories for themselves.
I Interestingly enough I was actually reminded more of an oral history in the vein of Studs Turkel et al as I read this. I liked it and found it quite interesting, but I wish perhaps there was more interviews - though I'm not sure what I would have gained from that. This opened my eyes to a number of missed opportunities and severely misunderstood come-ons and ruses which were used on me, and to which I was blind. I have to periodically reread this book, I think.
Nothing is lost. May 06, Ben Connolly rated it did not like it Shelves: japan. An interesting premise, but it fails to deliver.